Everyone that asks me about my first time I end up telling them my 3rd time. The first two times I don’t count not for the embarrassment or the stigma that would be place apon me but for the simple fact that the third time was the first time I approved and allowed it to happen. It was my freshmen year me and Billy have been dating for almost a year. he loved me so dear and the sad thing was, well I just wanted to have sex with someone I semi care about before it happened again….the time was short and for a brief moment I did love him. Only after the fact that I had sex with him I told him what happen in my past. My true first time I was 5 and he well he was 12, ah my babysitters son. We were all playing an innocent game of hide and seek. he was the seeker and everyone went to their hiding spot mine was the dog house that was in the garage that lead to the kennel he… he found me…kissed me and he pulled my undies down… only couple years later and after we moved did I realized what happen. my 2nd time I was actually dating Billy (3rd time) it was the summer going in to my freshmen year me and a couple of my friends, one of the guys I hung out with I flirted with. He texted me late at night I’m outside I went to the basement let him in to hang out. we talked and had a great time he kissed me I told him I’m sorry I’m dating someone but I really like you…. he still procuded time not to make noise so I didn’t wake my mom and dad up….. lifted my shirt up he pinned my arms down told me you know you want it just let it happen… that night I cried to the point were I didn’t think I could cry anymore. Even after telling what happen to me Billy still loved me and I, after a year and 2 mths, broke up with him and broke his heart.
Billy was my first because I wanted someone I trusted and knew who loved me…..
To guy 1 and guy 2: I’m not mad at you for what you did and if I could change it I don’t believe I would. Everything that has happen in my life made me who I am today. So in that aspect I would like to say thank you.
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