Where it happened: my bed
Langauge: English
Sex: Female
Rating: 5
Category: Straight
I was 17, and it was the summer after we had graduated from high school. We had been together for almost 6 months. I loved him and he loved me – we had said so about a month prior, though I knew the day I met him.
We had been fooling around pretty seriously for quite awhile, and frankly, I was ready to get it done and over with. I wasn’t scared, and I wasn’t interested in waiting for marriage. I was waiting for love, but I had love, so I didn’t understand what there was to wait for.
We were on my couch one night making out. He was on top of me, and we were both too excited to think straight. I thought to myself, “Now is the time.” It just felt right. But I wasn’t on birth control, and when I asked him if he had a condom, his face fell, and I knew our perfect moment had passed.
I thought about it for the next week. I was anxious to give our moment a second chance. We had the house to ourselves one Saturday afternoon, so I took control of the situation. I was on top of him in my bed, and he mumbled that he had a thing. I smirked at him, knowing that he was talking about a condom. I rolled off of him, and he grabbed the condom from his pocket. He stroked himself a few times in a struggle to get hard enough for the condom. He wasn’t a virgin, but that fact apparently did nothing to calm his nerves. He was barely hard enough to get the condom on, let alone get inside of me. It didn’t feel good. It didn’t hurt or anything, but it was not pleasurable at all. I moaned in feigned pleasure a few times to ease his nerves, but all I could think about was him with another girl, and whether or not he could get hard for them. It felt like he didn’t want me.
I soon got bored with missionary position, and tried to flip us over. At my slightest movement, he panicked, went completely soft, and asked me what I was doing. When I told him I was trying to flip us over, he rolled off me and onto his back, stroking himself to get at least semi hard again. I rolled over onto my side, tucked my chin into the nook between his head and shoulder, and smiled at him as I reassured him that we could try again some other time.
We are still together. I did love him, and I still do. But I wish I had waited. If love wasn’t enough, I don’t know what I should have waited for.
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