Where it happened: My bedroom
Langauge: English
Sex: Female
Rating: 7
Category: Straight
Who takes a little child and destroys her life in an instant. Something can not ever leave her. Something etched in her memories that it still effects her today?
Why am I writing this? Because I know I am not the only one. It has taken me 33 years to write and tell me story. It’s weird that just trying out for the play “My First Time” and being part of the production has made me WANT to tell my story. It still plays fresh in my mind today. Don’t feel sympathy for me. Get out and fight childhood abuse.
This is the first time…
You fucking asshole. I was just three years old. It was a stormy Chicago night and I was scared. I came to you as my babysitter; I couldn’t sleep.
You carried me back to my bedroom; it had Holly Hobby wallpaper. You laid me down back on my bed put the covers over me. You sat and stroked my hair to calm me. A few minutes later, you crawled into my bed and put the covers over you too. The next thing I knew, you were pulling up my nightgown and taking off my underwear. I was so confused.
You must have taken off your clothes or pulled that fucking dick out of your pants. All I know next, your hand was forcing my hand onto your penis and if I tried to let go, you forced it back onto hold it.
Then, I felt your finger inside me. It hurt so fucking bad. I tried to move. You wouldn’t let me. I tried to move again and for punishment you stuck another one of your bastardized fingers in me. I was crying.
I must have fallen to sleep or passed out because it was morning. I couldn’t pee. I was still in severe pain. To only be humiliated more I told my mom that I was having pain. She put me on the dining room table laid me out to inspect me. Only she didn’t do it in private. There were others around, including my rapist. She saw nothing wrong. I was only three.
So, (insert guy’s name here), you are still a major douche bag mother fucker in my world. I have tried to forgive you, but I cannot. I don’t know if I could even forgive my mother for ignoring the blatant abuse of her only daughter.
Thirty-three years later…it still fucking hurts so bad.
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